lardidah. i'm back.
bidding frenzy begins.
while waiting for the cors page to load i did a personality test.
see?
| Advanced Global Personality Test Results
|
personality tests by similarminds.com
trait snapshot:
messy, depressed, introverted, feels invisible, does not make friends easily, nihilistic, reveals little about self, fragile, dark, bizarre, feels undesirable, dislikes leadership, reclusive, weird, irritable, frequently second guesses self, unassertive, unsympathetic, low self control, observer, worrying, phobic, suspicious, unproductive, avoidant, negative, bad at saving money, emotionally sensitive, does not like to stand out, dislikes large parties, submissive, daydreamer
bad at saving money? is that why i got a coin bank for my birthday?
feeling quite bo liao.
don't know where to start updating from. let's just say life has been overwhelmingly good of late. yay =).
all I need is just a little time and the right situation. i may not have a magnetic personality, but i've been told that i'm rather entertaining on occassion. this past week has reinforced the belief that i'm terrible in group settings. how does that translate into cgling next year? ponderponder.
I will be used, just as I am.
i just ate half a pound cake and finished off the carton of milk. later i'm meeting serene and the twins for ice cream. pigged out at swensen's just sunday. ate portugese egg tarts and deep fried yam ball etc for dinner yesterday. diet has been most un-wholesome of late. see what chocolate pound cake is made of?
ingredients: sugar, egg, wheat flour, butter (cream, salt), vegetable fats and oils, cocoa, cocoa liquor, emulsifiers (477, 471, 475), milk solids, thickeners (1412, 1422), salt, vanila flavour (natural), baking powder, baking soda, food acid (330).
reminds me of food chem in JC, all the numbers of the chemicals they add to food.
which reminds me of kim thye and his classic line, "see that wall? go bang your head on it!"
digression, i was told, is used to explain complicated plot details. what this explains, who knows.
somewhere out there.
some joker is doing the same thing as me.
hawkishly watching the "next minimum bid" and "no. of bidders", refreshing the page.
and wondering whether to increase his own bid or not.
this is rather pathetic.
note to self: do not, under any circumstances, ever attempt to climb kota kinabalu without training, ever again.
was breathing so hard, even just 5 minutes into the climb. towards the end i was staggering, all i could hear in my head was the thump of my heartbeat and it was screaming, "fatigue! fatigue!". lol. so drama. twas a humbling experience. really relied on the group to encourage me, it was a portrait of what fellowship should be. the stronger helping the weaker, the weaker being humble enough to accept that help, each member doing their best and contributing in whatever capacity they could, journeying together. its like that song grace let me hear, if we are the body by casting crowns.
But if we are the body
why arent His arms reaching
why arent His hands healing
why arent His words teaching
and if we are the body
why arent His feet going
why is His love not showing them there is a way
Jesus paid much too high a price
for us to pick and choose who should come
and we are the body of Christ
the metaphors used in the bible are deep. trouble is, having been exposed to them since young, i seldom question myself about what they really mean. ponderponder.
I really enjoyed being with the people on the trip =). Berwine, Chelsea, Grace, Nian and Shaun. or rather, BG Shaun! haha =) They are some of the nicest, kindest, goodest people i've ever met and for once I feel like i belong somewhere. That feeling extended to when we went to rachel's church and later to the OG dinner. I've always kinda felt out of sorts, since secondary school days as the weirdo jiak kentang in a primarily chinese-speaking environment. But just maybe i've found my place. ponderponder.
i'm supposed to be doing nothing for the next two weeks. but i doubt thats going to happen. I've got things to do and people to see!
love and affection,
becky
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